Clem’s NRL Supercoach Captains: Round 26

I went to the 8^th Wonder of the World last Thursday night. 

And what a stunning sight to experience. 

Up on the hill with the Tigers faithfuls, including the one and only Max Bryden.

Chanting, singing, experiencing the euphoria every time that score board was changed over when the Tigers scored, living the crushing pressure and anxiety every time Manly scored. 

And the end. OMG the end.

The joyfulness of a hill full of Tigers fans celebrating a victory is nothing short of glorious. Angels in heaven.

Surely Leichhardt is one of the greatest places on earth to watch the footy.

I will return.

Especially as I managed to find my way there from Bondi without getting lost once which is my greatest navigational success of all time. I basically try assisted my own try, line-breaked myself and nailed the two.

It really was me you should have brought in last week all along.

Now in other news, my teams apparently off bendering again, but that’s okay.

With just two rounds left it’s best to just let the boys go and have some fun and then we can all regroup in February next year for the new season. 

Let’s think of this as a rebuild year. Rebuilding over benders and cheap hookers. It’s truly good for the soul.

I have 3 trades left – so let’s see out the season in the most stunning way possible – SJ, Nicho, and possibly Cheese. Boom.

Now let’s move on to the Captains and we’ll start with: 

Embed from Getty Images

Your Vice Captains

The Storm are dehydrated with a resting of key players, and you know that there is only one man who can quench dehydration and that is of course the one and only Scott Drinkwater.

Scotty D is a most obvious VC this week.

Playing the Thursday night game, averaging 95 from his last 3 matches, ranked second overall in SuperCoach points this season – chuck the VC on and get ready to loop…unless your balls are so big you carry them around in a wheelbarrow – in that case, it’s a Thursday night straight Captain for you friend.

Good luck and God speed.

Of course, you can’t forgo a cheeky VC on Val Holmes in this game either.

Currently the 4^th ranked player for points in SuperCoach, he’s averaging a casual 112 in his last 3 matches.

145 points vs the Raiders in Round 24 including a hat-trick, coming off the bye, nice and fresh…what’s not to love.

And that brings us to the Saturday game. Where two of the greatest halfbacks to ever exist on this planet will battle it out at Shark Park in what will be forever known as:

Embed from Getty Images

Shaun’s Last Stand*

And what a legend!

It is the end of an era. The memories. The joy he has brung the masses.

And so yes. Yes, you may Vice Captain or even Captain Shaun Johnson in his very last game this Saturday night.

It is our absolute duty and our pleasure to do so sir! 

I have hoarded a trade for this exact moment.

I’m jumping right on and riding him into the sunset of retirement. One. Last. Game.

As our goddess Mariah says, 

“There’s a hero
If you look inside your heart
You don’t have to be afraid
Of the Sharks at Shark Park
There’s an answer
If you reach into your soul
And the sorrow that you know
Will melt away

And then SJ comes along
With the strength to carry on
And you cast your fears aside
And you know you can survive
So when you feel like hope is gone
Look inside you and be strong
And you’ll finally see the truth
That a hero lies in he”

And okay, so the stats probs say don’t do it with the average of 58 and such statistical red tape such as that, but we are not here to make it make mathematical sense – who cares about the statistical physics when we are here to celebrate the greatest Kiwi to ever walk this earth. 

The romance of Vice/Captaining SJ in his final game is just too beautiful to ignore – the heart wants what the heart wants.

*Disclaimer – I stole that clever word play off Anton the absolute GOAT of Wah’s Twitter, owner of the famous Bunty Appreciation Society sign, and all-round good guy who is currently making signs for us group of faithfuls who are heading out to Shark Park on Saturday to watch our hero SJ play his very last game.

If anybody else is heading out, let us all meet and celebrate SJ, one final glorious time.

Embed from Getty Images

Nicho Hynes

I honestly cannot believe this.

I have two trades left (3 actually). 

And with the word on the street being that there’s a chance that Nicho might front up in that number 7 jersey this Saturday night, glorious locks looking all wet and glorious and things – well. 

Guess I’m using one of my last trades on him too…

Who said being a trade hoarder was wrong – it feels so right.

Now, we can’t really VC both him and Shaun and we can’t really Captain them both either, but if you want to put a sneaky VC on Nicho (if he plays) against my Warriors this Saturday night I must warn you – I won’t be helping you out with a quick visit to the dressing room with a tub of V05 Wet Look Gel.

Or a rain dance.

You’re on your own this time – this gal’s a Wahs supporter, even when there’s glorious locks involved.

However, I will remind you of the time Nicho came back from injury and absolutely annihilated anyone who didn’t own him – and then I will counteract that piece of pro-Captaincy data with the 26 he scored vs the Warriors last time he played them. 

Do with that info what you will.

Embed from Getty Images

Kalyn Ponga

The Knights are playing the Titans at home this Sunday arvo.

The Titans love to leak points to fullbacks. 

It’s a marriage made in points heaven.

Ponga is the Captain of the Round. 

That is all.

Embed from Getty Images

James Tedesco

Of course, you might prefer to go with the big C on vintage Teddy. 

Top scorer in SuperCoach points this season, a 3-round average of 102, coming off two glorious tons…playing the Raiders at home with a nearly full-strength Roosters side by his side – if you own Teddy, just Captain him, sit back, crack a beer, and enjoy the ride. 

Your work here is done.

Now we will turn over to the owner of the finest voice in SuperCoach, he who is still victoriously celebrating that famous Tigers victory of last week, Maxy Bryden in:

Embed from Getty Images

Captains you should choose if you want to win your H2H this week:

Kalyn Ponga

The Titans are Voldermort’s Army and fullbacks are Harry Potter.

They just hate number 1s and let them go massive (unless that fullback is the Hammer who I petitioned Clem to buy who subsequently has been awful).*

Ponga is going 120+ this weekend. 

James Tedesco

It’s been the retro revival of James Tedesco this season and despite how brave the Raiders were last week, the Chooks at near full strength are a different beast. It’s another big one incoming for James.

Do you ever feel uneasy with how much you’re gambling with? You’re not alone, sport fans love a punt, but sometimes it can get a bit out of control. There’s help available with Gareth Wyatt and the team at CECAL. It’s nothing to be ashamed of, so make the call and get in contact here: https://bit.ly/3L2yG1W

Drinky/Val:

If you own a Cowboy, they’re an obvious VC this week.

If that Cowboy is Drinky you could boldly throw the C on him knowing you wouldn’t be able to C your other fullback.

These two could go mega.

Zac Lomax:

A spicy one here but his floor is basically 70 at the moment with his offloads and goal kicking.

Throw in one try and that goes to 100. Up against the Eels left edge of Blaize and Sivo, it could be a mega weekend for Zachary.

Nicho:

We don’t even know if he plays but if he does, just remember what he did returning from injury to start last season.

*I used my last boost on Hammer – I like to think of it as just casually hammering the last nail into my SuperCoach coffin.

Embed from Getty Images

Verdict

SJ is the GOAT.

Also, you should probs VC a Cowboy and then Captain Ponga or Teddy. 

Unless you are a hopeless romantic like me and you’re going to whack the VC on SJ for the thrill of One. Last. Time. 

I’ll never let go SJ. I’ll never let go…

And on that note, I hope your weekend’s as beautiful as Jakey T’s thumb.shau

Much love and see you back here for one last dubious Captaincy call before the season’s over…

Clementine xxx